Stuck in a Rut?
How to Get to the Root of What’s Blocking Your Growth
As many Christians can attest, when we surrender to God and invite Him to come into our lives, He begins a life-changing, transformational process in us that produces new ways of living, thinking, and acting! The transformation takes the old, ugly parts of our hearts and replaces them with the new, beautiful characteristics and traits of our Father’s own heart! This process of change spans our entire lives and is never stopped as long as we remain in Christ (Philippians 1:6; John 15:4).
So what do we do when we feel like that transformational process isn’t happening in certain areas of our lives? How do we handle being stuck in the same old patterns of bad habits, despite our desperation to break free? We’ve all been there and had our vices! These habits may be physical habits like alcohol addiction, drugs, gambling, or watching pornography. They could even be emotional or mental habits such as critical thought patterns, habitually being angry with friends and family, or even giving into fearful thinking about our future.
No matter what we’re struggling with, the great news is that nothing is too difficult for God and we can find total freedom and peace in Him! We may just have to change our approach to the process to give Him full access to those areas of our hearts.
As Albert Einstein once famously said, “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” There’s a lot of truth in this statement! We’ll always walk in circles and stay stuck in our habits if we approach our problems with the mindset that we can force ourselves to change old patterns by simply “trying harder.”
How do we really break out of the rut to really see our thoughts and behaviors changed? To understand the answer, we must draw from God’s Word and on what we know of how our minds work!
Core beliefs: the hidden filters of our mind
God created our minds to constantly gather information and make observations about the world around us. Once our brains make an observation about something, our minds then interpret the information and organize it to fit into new or existing beliefs we’ve formed. There are countless “beliefs” that the human mind either forms or reinforces daily. Some are mundane: “A cup of coffee only tastes good with 3 packets of sugar.” Some, are weightier: “I embarrass myself every time I try to hang out with a group of people.”
The possibilities of beliefs we can form in our minds are endless, but there are certain “core” beliefs that we are programmed to form early on in our lives that influence all the other beliefs we will ever form. These core beliefs act as filters by which all future information and observations are processed. Each of these “filters” is built on the platform of a single belief!
Through studies conducted on the mind, we know that most of our actions stem from these core beliefs we form in our minds. Events and circumstances around us activate these beliefs in us which generate certain thoughts in our minds. These thoughts then affect our emotions and behavior. There’s evidence of this truth in scripture, as well: Proverbs 4:32 tells us to guard our hearts because everything else we do flows from it. What’s in our heart/mind has the power to affect every area of our lives!
Once these core beliefs are established in our minds, they create lenses/biases through which we view the world. These biases affect our perception of the world and cause us to make observations that further strengthen what we already believe-whether right or wrong!
Our Beliefs are Built on Truth or Lies
When an event happens in our lives and our brains scramble to interpret and process what occurred, we will either form an accurate belief about the event, or an inaccurate belief. Whichever one is formed will influence how we organize and process future information.
Sometimes inaccurate beliefs are formed as protective mechanisms in us during times that we feel threated or are harmed; this is especially true in childhood. I once heard a story of a little girl who, one day, heard laughter in another room of her home and went to investigate. When she walked in to the room, everyone stopped laughing and stood silently staring at her. In that moment, she formed the belief: “No one wants me around.” Little did she realize that the people in the room were planning her surprise birthday party for the next day and fell silent to keep from giving anything away when she entered the room. The next day, at her party, the girl struggled to enjoy herself as she was plagued with the thought that no one truly wanted to celebrate her! She then grew up processing the world through the lens of rejection, which ultimately sabotaged any meaningful relationship she tried to have until she discovered God’s truth-and found healing!
When we accept and form a false interpretation and belief of something that happens, this falsehood takes root in us as a lie that challenges the Truth of God (2 Corinthians 10:5). One characteristic of such lies is that they usually affect our view of God, ourselves, or others. In the case of the young girl, the lie for her was that no one truly loved her.
When these false beliefs are established in our minds, they blind us from processing and making any observations that could challenge them, keeping us locked in a cycle of lies. In spiritual terms, this becomes known as a stronghold.
These strongholds are areas of our minds that we have not fully submitted (even inadvertently) to the Truth of God for the renewal process that can bring about lasting change and transformation in us! These false beliefs block spiritual growth and act as a barrier to prevent us from recognizing the Truth of the Holy Spirit that can produce change in us. They are usually the reason that we get stuck in place and can’t seem to make progress in areas of our lives!
Strongholds affect our identity and influence our view/relationship with God and others-isolating us from a support system and blinding us to the ways that God is speaking to us and trying to bring breakthrough in our lives!
Such strongholds are usually beliefs we don’t even realize we have; concealed under layers of defensiveness in us that are automatically activated when someone steps too close to our fear and triggers those defenses. Our knee-jerk response to these automatic negative thoughts will usually come in the form of anger, irritation, and hurt.
When we are holding onto an inaccurate belief that’s blocking progress in our lives, we will usually notice some of the following.
Indications of a false belief:
- We keep trying to change in an area of our lives only to repeatedly find ourselves back in the same spot.
- We are unsure about how to move forward and see growth in an area of our lives.
- The way we really feel about a matter doesn’t quite line up with how the Bible says we should feel.
- We have a difficult time believing the truth about God’s love for us; or we feel that we must earn His approval.
- We have low self-esteem.
- We are discouraged, depressed, and disengaged in an area of our life.
- We have self-sabotaging tendencies.
- We are experiencing fear in one or more areas of our life.
- We frequently experience isolating guilt and shame, especially in quiet moments.
- We have “touchy” areas of our heart where we can easily get triggered and defensive about certain things.
You can probably relate to some (if not all) of these. That’s because we all have areas of our minds that the Lord must still transform! The great news is that He’s already told us that His work in us would not be finished until the day we are with Jesus (Philippians 1:6). The transformational process in us takes place when we cooperate with the Holy Spirit and allow Him to systematically fill us with His Truth and tear down lie after lie in our minds (Romans 12:2).
So what are some practical ways we can partner with the Lord to break down the barriers holding us back from real progress in our lives? Read on!
Break out of the Rut
Step 1: Identify the Lie
The very first step to take to break out of the rut we may find ourselves in, is to pray and ask the Lord to reveal to us the hidden parts of our heart that don’t line up with His Truth. If we pray this earnestly, He will be faithful to show us areas where He wants to set us free! We can’t truly transform by ourselves, no matter how much science we use! True, lasting transformation and renewal comes only from the Father, so it is crucial that we ask for His guidance and help as we begin to dig deep!
After we have surrendered to the Lord and invite Him to guide us and reveal His Truth to us in this journey, we then focus on identifying the false belief/spiritual stronghold that is buried in our minds. This can be difficult to pin down, so to do this, we want to pay attention to the times that we feel triggered. It requires us to become more aware of our emotions throughout the day.
Emotions are the smoke to the fire of our thoughts. They are indicators of the types of thoughts we are thinking. The Bible tells us that the “purposes” (thoughts) in a person’s heart are like deep waters, but a person of understanding will draw them out (Proverbs 20:5). When we begin to feel upset, angry, or even just irritated, we should stop, assess the situation, and try to identify the exact thought that caused the downward spiral in our emotions.
Psychologist Albert Ellis in the 1950’s designed a method of challenging these negative thoughts when he developed the ABC Model. According to his model, when we are triggered, we should ask ourselves the following:
- Activating event: What event triggered our negative feelings?
- Beliefs: What beliefs or thoughts arose in response?
- Consequences: What was the emotional or behavioral outcome?
This model is a great start to becoming more aware of what’s going on in our heads! Keeping a “thought journal” around so that we can go through the ABC’s and record the times that we find ourselves slipping into habitual negative emotions can be very helpful at this stage. We will begin to see a pattern that certain thoughts lead to negative emotions in us and then we can begin to dig deeper to challenge some of those thoughts! We can ask ourselves helpful questions to challenge the thought, such as:
When did I first start believing this thought? What evidence do I have that supports or contradicts this thought? What does the Bible say about this?
While this step will take time and effort to complete, it will lead to significant changes in our thought patterns when we stick with it! Eventually thoughts such as “I think they don’t appreciate me” may lead us to recognize core lies such as: “I have to do more to be loved because I’m unlovable.”
For this step, taking the time to stop, assess, and write things down is crucial for us to be able to organize and recognize faulty thought patterns in ourselves.
At times, this task is best tackled with the help of a professional. If it’s difficult to make sense of your thoughts, consider enlisting the help of a trusted Christian counselor or psychologist who can offer a fresh perspective on some of your thought and emotional patterns. Oftentimes, the Lord will use an outside, trusted perspective to help us break out of something that’s been holding us back in isolation.
Once the lie has been identified, we’re ready for step two!
Step 2: Replace the Lie with Truth
The best way to destroy a faulty belief/lie in our minds is to challenge it with the truth. Finding scriptures in the Bible that reveal the promises and truth of God, and then using that truth to refute faulty thought patterns can help break down a false belief in us.
For instance, to overcome a false belief in my mind that told me that the future (and any change) was to be feared, I found scriptures about how God had good plans in store for me, was always with me, and instructed me not to fear because He was my defender and my rock. The Lord also reminded me of all He had already done in my life; He was a good Father. (Allowing the Lord to show us His truth playing out in our lives is powerful!) I focused on these truths and used them to challenge any negative thought that would try to convince me otherwise (Revelation 12:11)
Once I accepted I started to focus on the truth, it could then be established in my mind as a new belief and the “filter” that provided me with a more positive and accurate view of the world.
By regularly reminding ourselves of what God says, we can challenge the lies that will try to get a foothold in our minds. His Word is the best weapon against the lies of the enemy (Hebrews 4:12).
Step 3: Regularly Read the Bible
Developing the habit of regularly spending time with the Lord and allowing Him to speak to us through His Word can help us to break out of stagnation in our lives and keep us filled with His protective Truth! A study conducted by The Center for Bible Engagement studied over 400,000 Americans and found that those who read their Bibles 4 or more times per week were 60% less likely to experience spiritual stagnation in their lives! Reading the Bible regularly also had many other benefits, including a decrease (59%) in viewing pornography, a decrease (57%) in getting drunk, better mental health, stronger relationships and an over 400% increase in sharing the gospel! (https://bttbfiles.com/web/docs/cbe/Scientific_Evidence_for_the_Power_of_4.pdf)
The Bible confirms this very truth in 2 Timothy 3:16-17, which says: All scripture if God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting, and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.” (See also Jeremiah 23:29; Hebrews 4:12)
Adding time with the Lord into our daily routine will help His truth to stay at the front and center of our minds, challenging anything (including faulty beliefs) that may contradict it throughout the day. As we do this consistently, and diligently seek the truth of God, the lies that have ensnared us will be brought to light so that we can demolish them and experience the true breakthrough God intended for all areas of our lives!
Hi! I’m Bebe!
I’m dedicated to helping believers walk in the freedom that comes from renewing their minds in partnership with God. With a background in psychology and a deep love for scripture, I help bridge the gap between spiritual growth and practical mental health strategies. Check out our podcast, videos, and other resources and join me on this journey as we explore how to truly unlock the peace of God in our lives!
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